"I Don't Get It."

I have interviewed at a couple of places and just sent in my resume to two more yesterday. One of them was my former employer. I have requested information on two positions from them now and have not received a reply on either. I asked the CEO, who I have considered a bit of a mentor, if I should continue to apply or if my time with the Society is over. His reply was silence. Deafening, crushing silence.

This is someone who, a year ago, told me I was in the position and had the talent to run any department he could think of within a not-for-profit association. To quote the great, misunderstood Paula K.: "I don't get it."

Couple this with the fact that I am not getting call backs on my interviews and I am feeling utterly unemployable after 3 years on the Mommy Track. I don't know what to do. I have been applying for positions at the level I was at, some below and some above. I am starting to panic. I know staying home with Jack was absolutely the right thing to do and I would not change a thing given the chance. But really? After 3 years I am untouchable? How the fuck does that happen? I am trying really hard not to be bitter about it, but as you can see, failing miserably at that, too. I am going to go load up on Effexor now.

Party Like It's 1699...

...Or whatever year The Plague hit.

Had a great celebration of "One Year in the House Without Burning it Down" this past weekend. Many friends, new and old, came and those of you who didn't are losers and are off The List. I kid, I kid.

The testosterone hung heavy over the grill, where Dad was in command and many men stood in awe of his gift of burning up some tasty meat. Kids climbed all over J's new play structure, which Naomi was man enough to get up on top of her car to procure. It was a hit. And the women, well they looked to be having a chatty good time, too. It does seem like a good time was had by all and we may even do it again some day.

I think, however, that we are NOT having the July 4 brunch this year. There were wayyyyy too many "maybes" that turned into yeses the day before on this party that gave me the impression that people were waiting for a better offer that never materialized. So you can reference back a few pages to "Retiring as an Event Planner" for why there will be no July 4 Brunch.

Also, we all partied so hard that 2 out of 3 Zimmers prefer to be on antibiotics this week,. Jack was at the doctor's on Sunday with a double ear infection and Pink eye. Side not: Another reason to LOVE our pediatrician: Sunday, non-posted hours for emergencies. No ER or Urgent Care for us. Love them. I was at the Urgent Care on Tuesday with strep throat and a sinus infection. Methinks we all just had too much fun. Perhaps J and I were licking things we oughtn't. Who knows? Either way, I am tired and congested and Jack is in a baaaad mood. Also had to cancel date night. Bummer

Hope everyone had a great Memorial Day. Catch up with you after day 10 of my Augmenten.

Whew... Busy Weekend!

Anyone else glad it's Monday? No? Just me...

A busy weekend here at Chez Zimmer. Happily so, I believe. Jack has a bit of a cold (Damn the Mystery Bink that came home with him from school last week!), so we have been tending to that.

Saturday we took it easy until after nap time, doing the "is it gonna rain or is it NOT gonna rain" dance that the rest of Columbus was doing, too. We did make it out to Babies 'R Us to pick up a present for Jack's favorite teacher in the PM. Jack's teacher Jamie is LARGE with child. I have no earthly idea how she manages 13 toddlers as well as she does while also being ready to pop. Jack adores Jamie and we do, too. She is a fully-involved member of Team Jack. I hope against all hope that she returns to Jack's class after this baby is born.

Saturday evening we attended the "'Hoods Dinner" at Temple Israel. You read that correctly. They believe themselves to be clever. It is a joint event with the SisterHOOD and the BrotherHOOD, and so it is the "Hoods" event. Go ahead, take a moment to regain your composure from the uproarious laughter. I'll wait...

At the dinner, I received the Sisterhood Volunteer of the Year Award (please hold your applause). This is their way of making sure I don't skip out on Sisterhood for another year, when they have me slated to become co-president with my buddy Mel (also LARGE with Child). I do not deal especially well with being made to stand at the front of the room while people say nice things about me, so it was a bit of a squirmy moment, but very, very nice. I was sorry that I was made to uninvite The Feebster. As it was, they made us squish 12 around a table made for 10, so I guess it was for the best, although I still feel guilty.

After dinner we went out with a group of new friends. This excites me because we are always trying to expand out social circle and have never had any luck. These were mostly couples where the men are now either serving on the Brotherhood Board with Osi or the women are on the board with me in Sisterhood. We went drinking. I can recall no invitation to drink from the Catholics. Reason # 216 to just go ahead an convert. The auxiliary organizations hold their meetings with beer! (not really but, damn, we could have gotten some shit DONE!) I am very, very stoked about this particular group of people. It is like getting to hang with the cool kids. Obviously, they have not yet figured out that I am a band geek (or just a big, fat outsider, period. Really, when do we get to shed the labels from our youths???).

Sunday was the Baby What A Deal sale bright and early at the JCC. Opening the doors at this sale was not unlike the combining of A) the running of the bulls in Pamplona and B) the Filene's Basement Wedding Dress Sale. I tried not to make eye contact and tried to make myself as small as humanly possible. I was frightened. But it was an excellent fundraiser for Jack's preschool program, so it was worth the terror.

We also had Sara and Joe over for dinner. That's all I have to say about that.

So, as you can see, I am glad it is Monday, with Jackala off at preschool and Mommy and Frannie looking at each other thinking "Can we nap now?" Nope, back to the grind...

An Inspirational Bummer

I attended the Sisterhood's Closing Program last night - "Think Pink and Spend the Green." It was a program on Breast Cancer and a Boutique. Long story. Both portions of the evening were great, actually. I picked up a housewarming gift for Sara as she pepares to move to her sad "I sold my house so that I can I can pay my kid's legal bills" apartment and also a very cool pair of earrings.


Also, during the discussin part of he evening, I learned that if you a) had your forst child later in life and b) were on fertility drugs - the longer the more worse off you are, tha these increase your risk of developing breast cancer later in life. Now, somewhere along the line, someone may have mentioned this to me and, in my blind desie to produce an offspring I blocked it out and said "I don't care, I just want a baby." Well, I care now, bitches. Mel just looked at me in her deadpan way and said "You're goin' down." You have to know and love Mel to truly appreciate this comment for its comic genius in the moment.


Alice Krumm, RN was a featured speaker and I highly recommend her book "I Didn't Order This Pink Ribbon." She is a Columbus native who was diagnosed at 38 and just has a fantastic, sassy attitude about a lot of things. Loved her. I was so moved by her presentation that I gave her a standing ovation. I am still obsession today over the fac that I was the only one in the room to do so. This is how mind works. I have literally gotten twitchy about it a couple of times this morning, but I know no one else is thinkink about it today but me. I am such a self-obsessed moron. Anyway, Alice was fantastic.


Osi is being eleced onto the Brotherhood Board tonight. A fact that makes me giggle a little bit. There is a very good possibility that we could be presidents of the auxilary organizations of Temple Israel at the same time. We would be like King and Queen of Temple. I seriously want the tiara if that happens.

Ding Dong the Witch is Gone

I am thoroughly enjoying the Stat Counter feature I added on the blog. I enjoy this for no other reason than I can see that when people search "JCC Columbus" they are brought to my post about Jack being bitten 10 times in 6 months. This was my intention is titling the post the way I did. It thrills me to no end that when people are searching for childhood programs for their children, they will actually hear from a parent the kind of crap that went on there under Barbra Topolosky's reign of terror.

That being said, I need to update that posting. Mrs. T's last day at the JCC was May 2. It would seem that I am not the only parent to have a problem with her. Since her removal was abrupt and she didn't have another job lined up, it would seem to me that her departure was involuntary - FINE BY ME. I am just sorry I didn't have a chance to literally sink my teeth into her while I had the chance. Too bad it is assault when adults do it, but "not a big deal" when it happens 10 times in 6 months when 2-year-olds do it.

The Columbus JCC is still searching for an Early Childhood Director. I cannot recommend Nili Talis enough. LOVE HER! Love everything about her. She is excellent with the parents and the kids seem to adore her. She has a fantastic sense of humor and great ideas for creative classes for the kids and - in my dealings with her - is an awesome problem-solver. Have I mentioned I love her? So I guess I need to revamp my post to read something like "JCC Columbus' Nili Talis for President" or something of the sort.

A Happy Mother's Day

Today was a pretty good day, even by my irrationally high standards. Mom and Dad were here for the weekend and we dragged them out to Utica for the Velvet Ice Cream experience yesterday. It was a beautiful day and they had fun watching Jack climb on the playground, chase ducks and usurp Grammy's strawberry ice cream.

The whole clan was here today and it was mercifully uneventful. I believe Melissa has accepted the fact that Anna is here to stay. Osi is still irritated that Anna never talks to him, but she hardly ever talks to anyone but me, so, you know, I have no beef. No beef except the one-pound apiece steaks the men procured and grilled for Mother's Day lunch, of course. Holy Mother of Meat, Batman! They were delish! I also made a strawberry shortcake trifle that was quite yummy, too. The boys played so well together and it always amazes me how spectacular Donovan is with Jack, despite the fact that he is a good 7 years older.

I got to sleep in this morning and came down to a happy boy and a beautiful DKNY watch as a gift. This was something I actually needed and it is lovely. After almost 10 years together, Osi is starting to learn my tastes, which is good. There were also no carnations in the flowers. A first, I think. Maybe it just 10 years for all the tiny nitpicking preferences to sink in. Because it really is the thought that counts and the preferences, I will admit, are incredibly nitpicky.

So I had a wonderful Mother's Day that has made me grateful to be mommy to my boy and thankful to have my family. I'd like to bottle this feeling. You know Eli...he's a'comin'.

Girlz Gone Not At All Wild

My sister Melissa and cousins Nikki and Jenn convened in the booming metropolis of Wadsworth last weekend for a girls weekend. Needless to say, they didn't know what hit them.

For those of you who may not know, my mother is the youngest of 9 children. There are a lot of cousins. In the past, we have tried to get together every other year at a gathering affectionately known as FlemFest (as mom's maiden name was Fleming). This has recently turned into an annual event, but we won't get into that now. Even as an annual event, there just doesn't seem to be enough time for the "youngins" to catch up. So we tried a girls weekend, or really, a sleepover, instead.

The hotel was lovely and provided free ice cream snacks and - as bizarre as it may seem - corn dogs. Alas, by the time we returned from dinner, the freezer with the frozen treasures was gone. Not to be deterred (not many Fleming women are), Jenn received 2 ice cream sandwiches by accosting Doug, the FABULOUS desk attendant. We highly recommend the Holiday Inn Express in Wadsworth, Ohio.

Much giggling and talking ensued, until the herd if elephants checked in at midnight. Again, Jenn took care of the situation. Upon reflection, I see we had silently agreed upon a lead of the assembly. There was a group if I-don't-know-what racing up and down our hall at about midnight. At this point, someone knocked on our door. We all looked startled. All of us except for Jenn, who got up like she was gonna brawl. She flung open the door and stared down the woman who had knocked who immediately - and to who own horror - realized she had the wrong room. Apparently she was the herd's chaperon. Traveling with them, we would later overhear, was someone named "Pa" who would, as the party decried in hushed tones, administer a "whuppin'" if he caught the girls running around the halls anymore. Their words, not mine. It was at this point that Nikki wondered aloud whether Laura Engles Wilder had come to stay in Wadsworth for the night. Did I mention that all of this was made funnier by alcohol and the fact that we were all up way past our bed times?

Suffice it to say that a good time was had by all. We all caught up, know way too much about some others' of ours' medical conditions and indulged in some excellent overpriced beverages from Applebees. Overall, an excellent weekend.

Retiring as Event Organizer

I am beginning to wonder if I only have friends because I invite them places.

Since college, I have been the organizer of the group. If there was a birthday, a party to be planned, a cookout to be had or a gathering to partake in, I am your gal. I think I am getting kind of tired of the role. Especially since, with the exception of Erin's Easter Egg Hunt, we get invited nowhere.

Taking stock in the places we've been and the social events in which we've participated in the past year, most have them have been here. Girl's night blew up after Naomi's birthday. Nobody apparently has interest in it but me. Playdates have gone to the wayside and with summer coming up, here we are again, at cookout season.

We're having a party Memorial Day weekend, which no one seems to want to commit to (except Feeb - thanks). I know Osi will want to throw another July 4th Brunch, but I think I will protest, especially given what is turning out to be a poor turnout at the Memorial Day event.

Yes, I am bitching again. Perhaps that is why I never get invited anywhere. Is it that people are too involved with their everyday lives and families to get together with friends? Or is it that they have made other groups of friends of which I am not a part? I don't know, but it makes me sad either way.